I came off hormonal birth control 4 years ago and there is no going back.
I took the pill from my teenage years on and experienced most of my adult sexual life on a mix of internally produced and externally supplemented sexual hormones. Like so many other women. And it wasn’t until I stopped this supply that I noticed the side effects.
I finally felt myself again after this one conscious decision to stop feeding myself sexual hormones that stopped my natural cycle for 15 years and that deeply affected my physiology. Not only did I experience a dramatic increase in libido, I also felt stronger and more present.
Almost every woman I talked with has (had) side effects from hormonal birth control, that she might not even notice while taking the medication. Maybe it is so subtle or maybe she thinks that is just the way she and her sexuality is. Nothing to be changed. (As you can imagine I strongly disagree here: you can ALWAYS change!)

What for me started as a decision that I don’t want to manipulate my system in this way any more turned out to be the starting point of my empowerment that reaches well beyond my sexuality. It was my experience that hormonal contraception not only affected my sexuality, but also my sense of personal power.

My body returned to a natural cycle very quickly and I had the opportunity to finally get to know my cyclical nature. I didn’t quite like it in the beginning, but inspirational conversations with women and the book “Wild Power” sparked my curiosity. I tracked my cycle for some months and found astounding parallels in mood or energy levels between the corresponding days in different cycles. I started to notice my ovulation again (I could already sense it as a teenager before I started taking the pill).

And now? I love my menstruation and wouldn’t want to miss it. I love the change in my body over the course of the month. I know where my strengths lie in every part of my menstrual cycle. I respect the quiet time of the month when I bleed and want to crawl into the bed (which I actually do). Along with all of this comes the knowledge that it will change. I will rise again, find my energy, go out into the world to dance, shine and lead. And I will become quieter again, show up with a different quality. And I will retreat again.

I love my menstruation because it is a wonderful teacher that life is change. It also teaches me to trust and listen to my body. The body knows.

What is your experience with hormonal contraception? Write below in the comments!

In love,

Maria

Tl;dr

• Only after removing hormonal contraception did I notice the effects it had on my body and mind.
• I rediscovered my cyclical nature.
• I love my menstruation.